Dodo bird. It's what's for dinner.

Yeah, I know this is timwheatBOOKS.com, but guess what?  I write music too.  As of right now I only have my three heaviest projects on the Music page, but as time allows I'll be posting more.  I should have a little bit of something for everyone, although I don't really delve into boy band type stuff, or rap, but i would like to write a techno album someday, I just haven't saved up enough glow sticks or pacifiers yet.  Anyway, three albums are up over there.  The first is from the Absolute Zero days, which actually had the material done for the second album, it just needs to be put back together again, which maybe I'll do one of these days, followed by Counterstrike, and then my solo metal project Anarchosis.  They'll be available for streaming at no cost for the rest of time, or until I die, or run out of money to pay my web-hosting bill.  If you really like one or all of them they'll be available to download for the paltry sum of $3.99 per album and will be a downloadable rar file, and then you can put the mp3's on all your devices and listen to me 24/7.  It'll be awesome.  Onto the blog!

Does anyone read this blog?  My site statistics say they do.  My site statistics say that a number of you do, but obviously if you don't, you'll never see this, so I guess you can shove it, unless you are reading this, then thanks for coming!  The numbers vary from week to week and if something bad happens to me those blogs seem to really take off, but I'll be honest, I don't particularly care for bad things happening to me.  I prefer writing blogs like The Story of My Life.  Naked and Afraid With One Direction and Justin Bieber (which gets a surprising number of hits when someone types in "one direction guys naked" or "justin bieber naked" into google.  Not millions, but not zero either.)  and Bling, Bling Pinky Ring.  That's a Billion With a B Son.  Do I normally talk like that?  Nope.  Am I actually talking?  Nope.  I'm typing.  

So, as I formulate ideas for what I'm going to blog about from week to week I take a number of things into account.  

1.  Do people actually care what I have to say?  The answer to this question is, generally speaking, no, and that's fine.  Out of the 6+ billion people in the world I'm lucky to get 200 readers a week, last week's procured about 70, and I've peaked at just north of 1200.  Those would be good numbers if I were the leader of a cult and had complete control over those 50-200 people's minds, but let's not mince words here.  I couldn't even get a single person to leave me an Amazon review a couple weeks ago, let alone convince them to drink the kool-aid or become my personal slaves so that I can siphon off their hard working dollars and buy myself gold toilet bowls that I have filled with bottles of Acqua di Cristallo Tributo a Modigliani water for the paltry sum of $60,000 per 750 ml by my specialized toilet tank/bowl filler guys.  Slackers.

2.  Is there a purpose to writing this blog?  The official purpose of a blog is to connect with readers and convince them that they like you and want to buy stuff from you.  So far I've been most able to convince people who already like me to continue liking me, although I seriously doubt that they would have stopped liking me just because I don't write the blog.  I could probably send them a text once a year or two and stay just as relevant.  I've actually contemplated stopping writing this thing because I've watched my subscription numbers tank the last 6 weeks or so.  Maybe I suck at it and instead of connecting I'm repulsing, like the feeling I get whenever I see a celebrity or rich person on tv that is 70 years old and has had half their nose chopped off, neck skin sawed in half and tucked behind their ears, eyebrows tattooed on their forehead, and who's face is botoxed into that constantly shocked state.  When I think about that, though, I think about how I feel like writing the blog is an exercise for me.  Kind of like lifting weights to get huge, although if I lifted weights as often as I write I'd be absolutely massive, or absolutely injured.  I don't know if my body could handle fourteen hour lifting sessions quite as well as my brain handles fourteen hour writing streaks.  

3.  How can I appeal to more readers?  I ask myself that question a lot.  I've contemplated a number of ways and have tried a lot.  In some of my most recent blogs you'll notice more media rich content.  People are supposed to love funny videos, songs, gif's and the like, but I certainly haven't seen that affect my numbers a lot and it oftentimes takes me longer because I have to look things up and link them and make sure I'm not stealing from people who are rich enough to care and want to sue me.  I've tried advertising it through facebook, twitter, and goodreads.  I've done it independently as well as in tandems/unison.  It doesn't seem to matter.  I do know a surefire way to get readers.  Have your dog die.  Sir Wheat's Axl Grease saw something like 600 hits and took me all of ten minutes to post.  I only have one dog left, though, and he's turning into a pretty good dog, but I honestly don't care for him as much as good old Axl.  Its OK, they're dogs, one is dead and I won't tell the other one to his face.   I haven't even taught him to read yet.

4.  Should my blog writing be representative of my novel writing?  Some experts say yes, some say no.  I know that my blog writing is not necessarily representative of my novel writing.  I would say that there are similar elements, but I'm certainly not throwing down action adventure stories every week.  I've contemplated doing a series that way through the blog, but I have a lot on my plate right now and nothing close to development that would actually fit that bill.  I have a pretty cool idea for one, but I feel like I'd have to write the whole thing first, since I often come up with awesome ideas in the end of a book that I have to go back and add in the beginning so that they make sense.  It would suck to write it live, week to week, and then miss out on something super sweet.

5.  Should I even continue the blog?  I won't lie, that's probably the first question I ask myself every week.  I've been at this about six months now, and at first it seemed like it had positive impact.  I sold a few books, got some good feedback, gained some facebook followers, collected quite a few subscribers.  The last couple of months, though, I've sold no books, gotten very little feedback, gained no facebook followers, and have shed subscribers like it was a Biggest Loser contest.  I'm in the writing game for the haul, but I'm not necessarily into wasting my time.  I can get practice while I work on The Sentinel, Akarthus, Letters From Maggie, Immortality, and the tentatively titled third installment in the Rex Chase series, Moskchenko.  That's right.  I have five novels I'm developing right now, along with the five children's books and not to mention the music bug has been gnawing at my brain.  The Sentinel is almost done, I have a good start on Akarthus, and Letters From Maggie, Immortaility, and Moskchenko are completely outlined.  Its not like I'm hurting for projects.  I guess what I'm saying is that if you like this blog you should tell me.  I'm inclined to keep doing it, but...

6.  There is no number 6.  I'm not saying that the number itself does not exist, because it does.  I've subbed in enough math classes lately to be certain of that fact AND I can see it right there at the top of my keyboard as well.  So, don't be afraid and I'm sorry if anyone defacated in their pants because they feared the number 6 may have gone the way of the dodo.  Speaking of dodos, I watched this movie with my kids the other day, "The Pirates: Band of Misfits", at least I think that's its name.  Anyway, the head pirate in that movie has a dodo bird that he thought was a parrot and they meet the Queen of England and she tries to eat the dodo and the whole thing is done in claymation, or digital computerized claymation or whatever, and then they turn into awesome pirates in the end and win pirate of the year.  I dug it.  Blog over.

 

Remember, if you like the blog you can hit the subscribe via email button which is right above the comment box if you click on comment.  Then you'll always know when I've posted!  Also, I appreciate it when you share on facebook/twitter and the like.  It only takes a second using the share button or icons above.  Wanna help fund the printing of The Sentinel?  Hit the donate button below!  Wanna fund it by buying a signed paperback or hardback?  Those are linked right here too!   Oh yeah.  FREE SHIPPING in the lower 48!  Thanks!

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Posted on May 28, 2014 .